Lost Without You Lord – 9-23-2013
The past few years have been a whirlwind for me physically and emotionally. Arthritis and degenerative disk disease have taken over my life. Bulging disks, swelling, inflammation along with in some cases the inability to walk and move freely. On any given day my pain level can range from 2 which I love to infinity (intolerable) and with that will come the increase of blood pressure readings, up and down emotions and the inability to focus. Your body cannot handle certain things and when attacked, your body will counter attack any invasion that is foreign. Chronic pain I am learning can zap the life right out of you. Millions face this crisis daily using medication just to be able to get through the day, in some cases not finding relief. Many commit suicide because of the inability to cope and not wanting to be a burden on anyone. Family and friends think most times it’s made up. Well I am here to tell you with a loud shout, No it is not and anyone who is dealing with chronic pain listen to me, I understand what you face. I understand your emotions and your willingness to give up. Also, listen to this, don’t give up and don’t give in. In Job chapter 2:7-8 satan attacked Job with boils and sores from the soles of his feet to the top of his head. In verse 8, Job took a tool to scrape the sores because the pain became so bad. Now, I don’t know about you but being in pain and then inflicting more pain to prevent the pain does not seem like a solution, I am wimpy wimpy wimpy. As you continue to read in chapter 2 you will see where Jobs wife poked at him saying, “Do you still hold fast to your integrity? Curse God and die!” From what she said to her husband do you think she really meant it or is she also a victim of the pain that was inflicted on Job? I believe she was conflicted due to the loss of her home, children and lively hood and now she is watching her husband suffer.
Now jump the Job chapter 42 and you will see the Job was restored in all ways and he lived a long life full of God grace. God is almighty and He knows exactly what His children face. The word of God does say in Psalm 37:23 “the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. I come to tell you that you are not alone. I come to tell you that this too shall pass and in the passing you will come to learn more about your endurance, your integrity and your faith. Though you may feel that there is no hope and you cannot continue life in the present state you are in, I am here to tell you that you can and you will. You will because God has given to you a life and the grace to live your life. God is preparing you for greatness though you do not see it or even feel it right now. You see, when we humbly accept Christ as our Lord and Savior, the very battles that we face in this carnal world and fleshly body is the taking up of our crosses and no, it is not easy and it was not told that it would be. When Jesus was paraded through the city on his way to Golgotha he carried his cross knowing that the will be his death for you, for me, for all of us so that we would not have to die. Read Matthew 27, Mark 15 and John 19.
Some of you may be saying if there is a God why do I have this or why doesn’t he take the afflictions away. Some of you may have been praying for as long as you can remember but see no results. Rest assured God knows and sees all. Even though God is a healer He starts in our hearts and minds. In the flesh we do have to see doctors and take medications and though God did not cause the pain and afflictions he does use the afflictions. I encourage you to study His word on healing. Study the book of Job and learn how he suffered and the story of how he was restored and rejoice that you too will be restored, in Gods time. Pray and believe that you have what it is you are praying for you see it all starts in our hearts and minds. We can either live negatively because of the issues or we can choose to be the light that Jesus spoke about. As for me, I can only focus on one day at a time because I cannot ever say what a day will hold for me. One day I am feeling good on top of the world and the next, I cannot breath due to the pain that my body faces. I cry, I get very angry and I get anxious. I even have panic attacks from the anxiousness. But get this, I refuse to give up. I refuse to let satan win and you too must stand in agreement to what God says about you. Now this is in no way saying I have no fear, I do. I too do not want to be a burden on my family. I too at times give up in my spirit because of the physical pain I face. I even wrestle with the fact that I am single and will I be blessed with a God fearing husband who will accept me fully in my present condition. I can only say to all of this to God be the glory. I can only praise Him because I know in my praise I am being restored. I know that I too am lost with Him.
In closing, I encourage you to stand, take up your cross and repeat after me I AM LOST WITHOUT YOU LORD and live like there is no tomorrow because in reality, we do not know what tomorrow holds.